October 8, 2015 Leave a comment
More interesting dreams last night. I dreamed that there was this girl that needed help down the road. I was walking down the road and she was waiting for a plumber on the side of it. She said that she lived in the woods. I offered to help her and followed her into the woods. She was quite lovely. We came to a clearing by a stream and she went into this vertical cave. All around were these amazing little houses. They looked like little cottages but sort of old style or like they might be lived in by gypsies/hippies. There was a large red carnival tent and a ship that looked like those stereotypical pirate ships. When the plumbers arrived, they weren’t plumbers but police and they were jumping off her car which was obviously very old and was never going to crank.
I also dreamed that I was on a train. Some man, who I can only describe as my boss asked me if I put two burners on the train for the coil. I told him that I only put on and that there weren’t any more burners. So, I was off to find the conductor and make sure one coil burner was enough. I remember thinking that I was in love with the conductor and I kept trying to talk to him and catch up to him but he would never listen to me or give me time to talk to him.
The first dream seems to be about getting in touch with myself. Bringing the authorities to my inner sanctum. A combination of two worlds in some way.
I often wonder what connection my romantic relationships have to my familial relationships. I am not close either to either one of my parents and oddly enough the only person I really have any relationship with at this time is my stepmom. I want to talk about my dad though. I don’t ever remember connecting with him in a meaningful way. I don’t know that it’s my fault or his fault. I think in some ways, he rejected me just as I rejected him. I think in some senses he was embarrassed by my obvious femininity and perhaps that’s why as an a adult my masculinity is more important to me. He’s not really a talkative person and we don’t really know what to say to each other.